Starting a new life...

One of the many things I’ve learned in my journey through life is that the fates throw at you only what you can handle. I’ve had a lot thrown at me; first raising my brother, the struggle with fertility, and a rough pregnancy. Now my husband and I were in new territory: we were new parents, but we could not be with our son and enjoy bonding time while he was in the NICU. For anyone who has not had a child in the NICU, it is an experience that I would not wish on anyone. While the nurses were wonderful and very helpful, it is not easy to see the machines and tubes on other babies, or in some cases your own. In our case Jonathan was only on monitors after the first couple days; once his IV of antibiotics was complete, he was observed for his heart rate and oxygen saturation levels. We still could not hold him for long periods except for feeding times; he later needed to go under the lamps for jaundice treatment.

Fate is a funny thing; when Jonathan was born I was worried that perhaps it was way too soon and wondered why this could have happened to us. As it turned out, it is a good thing he came early; he was able to get the medical care he needed and found out he has some anomalies that need further treatment. Whether or not those issues would have been discovered if he was full term we do not know; his pediatrician is wonderful and would likely have caught them, but the fact of the matter is he got the referrals and doctors he needed to look at him while he was in the NICU and saved us a lot of headache. While he may need surgery to correct some of the issues, overall he is a growing and otherwise healthy boy who is now flourishing at home.

While I do not think I would wish this experience on anyone, I do think that this experience reinforces the fact that one cannot change what they cannot control, and that fate decides when things are going to happen and why they happen when they do. The only things a person can do are roll with the punches and take each day and each situation as it happens. There is no point in worrying about what may happen, since there is no way for one to change how things are going to turn out in any case. It is better to enjoy each day with our loved ones, no matter what troubles may be coming, and focus on the good that is happening rather than the negatives that could happen.